Tonight we took you trick or treating for the first time. You were in an adorable dragon costume sent to you by your Auntie Meg. Mom went as Danyres Targarien from Game of Thrones, so she could be "mother of dragons".
We went in the lucas valley neighborhood, which is a place we might live to live some day. Your Mom's good friend Amy was back in town with her family, and they were trick or treating there.
You never got scared, despite the lights and scary sounds. You've not really had much candy in your life so far, and we wanted to condition you properly, so after your first house, we gave you one of the mini peppermint patties you had received. We knew you liked those because you went through aton of them at your great grandma's house. You liked it, smiled, laughed, got excited, and then signed "more, more!". I told you we had to go to the next house to get more. (I carried you the whole time).
At each house, i tried to get you to sign "Thank You" for the candy. You did a few times. Your mom opened a kit kat and fed it to you in pieces. We tried to find you candies that you could actually eat.
Your favorite part of the night, though, had nothing to do with candy. A bright green 8 inch glowstick made you lose your mind. You waved it around, you waved it in my face, in your face, and you grinned from ear to ear and laughed and wiggled. You thought it was the coolest thing. People kept giving them out, so by the end of the night you had quite the collection.
At home, once in bed, I let you play with your glow sticks. Figure you won't choke or anything. Can't hurt. You're still in your crib babbling away by yourself.
I dont know how much of tonight you'll remember. The kids in the neighborhood really seemed to be having a great time. I hope we get to have a lot of fun on Halloween together. I look forward to working on costumes of your choice when you're old enough to have a preference and express it.
My favorite tonight was a kid dressed as a candy vending machine. Awesome.
We both love you so much. So many people were so happy to see your adorable sweet face.
Friday, October 31, 2014
Sunday, October 19, 2014
You're walking!
You're really on the threshold of finally breaking through. Tonight in the garage, you chose to take the 5 to 7 steps from your mom to me, and then form me back to her. We'd sort of hold our hands out just in front of you, to make it seem a shorter distance, and you'd go for it. At first, you'd just dive at me when you got close, but eventually you realized you didn't need to hurry to finish, just to keep an even pace and walk up.
We were so thrilled and excited, and you were so happy that we were happy. I signed "again!" to you and you obliged. Of course, when you get super excited, you like to try to nibble me, and you did. So I also had to give you stern looks and tell you "no biting!" But you don't mean it maliciously, you're just playing, but you don't understand it hurts.
Then you decided you wanted to look in my empty kegs. And then you wanted to play chase, so I chased you behind the bar, which was in the corner in front of the storage shelves, and you'd lie on the ground laughing your ass off as I'd get closer and closer and then tickle you. You went nuts laughing and chasing me around, too. Then you got obsessed with the cat door.
Later tonight, you stood up, on your own at the corner of your changing table and took a few steps befor falling at the rug. I was excited and signed "again" and asked you to please do it again. You didn, this time making it all the way to me. You did it about 7 times, going to the corner, standing, letting go, then walking over to me, which involved a turn. Your mom got some video.
Your signing is also coming along in amazing ways. You saw a moon in the Big Red barn book on the alst page, and signed "moon" with your left hand. We tried to teach you the sign for "turtle" today, but it's not really an important word for you yet.
I gave you a bath tonight, and, as usual you try to turn the water on, which comes out cold. You don't mind it but your bath water gets steadily colder. So we try to move fast. You had a great time, as always, with naked time on our bed afterwards. You patted your mom's belly, then came over and didn mine, then back to her. Pulling up shirts.
I clapped loudly to discipline Midori, who was trying to pull something out of my Burning Man accessory bag to play with. You thought the single loud clap was cool and tried to do the same. It was awesome and adorable.
You're just the sweetest child. You like to have fun, try things. You learn very fast (when you care). It's a delight to spend so much time with you.
We were so thrilled and excited, and you were so happy that we were happy. I signed "again!" to you and you obliged. Of course, when you get super excited, you like to try to nibble me, and you did. So I also had to give you stern looks and tell you "no biting!" But you don't mean it maliciously, you're just playing, but you don't understand it hurts.
Then you decided you wanted to look in my empty kegs. And then you wanted to play chase, so I chased you behind the bar, which was in the corner in front of the storage shelves, and you'd lie on the ground laughing your ass off as I'd get closer and closer and then tickle you. You went nuts laughing and chasing me around, too. Then you got obsessed with the cat door.
Later tonight, you stood up, on your own at the corner of your changing table and took a few steps befor falling at the rug. I was excited and signed "again" and asked you to please do it again. You didn, this time making it all the way to me. You did it about 7 times, going to the corner, standing, letting go, then walking over to me, which involved a turn. Your mom got some video.
Your signing is also coming along in amazing ways. You saw a moon in the Big Red barn book on the alst page, and signed "moon" with your left hand. We tried to teach you the sign for "turtle" today, but it's not really an important word for you yet.
I gave you a bath tonight, and, as usual you try to turn the water on, which comes out cold. You don't mind it but your bath water gets steadily colder. So we try to move fast. You had a great time, as always, with naked time on our bed afterwards. You patted your mom's belly, then came over and didn mine, then back to her. Pulling up shirts.
I clapped loudly to discipline Midori, who was trying to pull something out of my Burning Man accessory bag to play with. You thought the single loud clap was cool and tried to do the same. It was awesome and adorable.
You're just the sweetest child. You like to have fun, try things. You learn very fast (when you care). It's a delight to spend so much time with you.
Monday, June 30, 2014
Open, Sesame
Your mom texted me yesterday While I was racing at the Southwestern Regional Championships to tell me that you'd figured out how to open the front door. You are now just tall enough to reach the handle, pull it down towards you to spring the lock. You then drop to your knees and pull on the doorstop attached to the door to pull the door open.
I greatly look forward to seeing you do this. While it means we'll have to take some precautions so you don't crawl out the front door and into the street, it also means you can plan ahead, understand how things work, and are happy to do things for yourself. All of these are good things. I'll try to capture this on video.
Once we start bolting the door, you're going to be very unhappy. I'd love to let it be for a bit so you can enjoy practicing your new trick, but it's probably best to be safe.
You've really turned the corner with your signing. You understand that the gestures we're using with words are important and have meaning, and you now try to copy them promptly, just as kids do with spoken words. You spontaneously signed "friend" for your Oliver a few days ago when I had you on the exercise ball. You pointed to him, and then did the cutest little twisty twist of your hands with a finger out to sign friend. At first I didn't understand, but then realized you were using the "friend" sign for Oliver, which is what we'd been doing to teach you a sign for him. I was thrilled.
Today I realized that you are pressing three fingers to your mouth for "water" which is similar. You were very particular today pointing and asking for your drink that had water in it. And then you used that gesture.
So now the challenge for us is to give you new signs as fast as you're picking them up. It's great to have ways of communicating with you.
Also, today you made a giant burp, and thought it was funny when mommy kept making burp noises back at you. You laughed and laughed.
I greatly look forward to seeing you do this. While it means we'll have to take some precautions so you don't crawl out the front door and into the street, it also means you can plan ahead, understand how things work, and are happy to do things for yourself. All of these are good things. I'll try to capture this on video.
Once we start bolting the door, you're going to be very unhappy. I'd love to let it be for a bit so you can enjoy practicing your new trick, but it's probably best to be safe.
You've really turned the corner with your signing. You understand that the gestures we're using with words are important and have meaning, and you now try to copy them promptly, just as kids do with spoken words. You spontaneously signed "friend" for your Oliver a few days ago when I had you on the exercise ball. You pointed to him, and then did the cutest little twisty twist of your hands with a finger out to sign friend. At first I didn't understand, but then realized you were using the "friend" sign for Oliver, which is what we'd been doing to teach you a sign for him. I was thrilled.
Today I realized that you are pressing three fingers to your mouth for "water" which is similar. You were very particular today pointing and asking for your drink that had water in it. And then you used that gesture.
So now the challenge for us is to give you new signs as fast as you're picking them up. It's great to have ways of communicating with you.
Also, today you made a giant burp, and thought it was funny when mommy kept making burp noises back at you. You laughed and laughed.
Monday, June 9, 2014
Yes!
You are having a bit of a breakthrough in communication. Your signing is getting faster and more consistent, and it's possible you're saying "more" (which comes out as "mo!"). Tonight at dinner you pointed to the multi colored daisies on mom's desk. You like the flowers. So I signed to you asking if you wanted a "flower" (which you know the sign for). You answered with a big dramatic nod of the head for "yes", and then signed for flower. SO I brought you the flowers. We did this many times, each time with me giving you fewer cues. Eventually, i asked what you wanted, and you signed for flower.
You're alo doing a very good job using "yes" to reply in the affirmative for things, though ususally you do it when we've done what you want, notin response to a question, but that's coming along, too.
It's so nice to be able to communicate with you, and I can see how happy yu are in being able to get what you want more easily by signing. I think you're getting that things and ideas have sign symbols, and you can use them to communicate.
I'm going to teach you the sign for "beer" next.
I loved back yard camping with you.
You're alo doing a very good job using "yes" to reply in the affirmative for things, though ususally you do it when we've done what you want, notin response to a question, but that's coming along, too.
It's so nice to be able to communicate with you, and I can see how happy yu are in being able to get what you want more easily by signing. I think you're getting that things and ideas have sign symbols, and you can use them to communicate.
I'm going to teach you the sign for "beer" next.
I loved back yard camping with you.
Monday, May 26, 2014
You did it!
I just want to quickly note that you stood freely using no hands for the first time yesterday!
It was a complete accident: You were standing on the back porch playing with the screen door, sliding it open and closed, as you like to do. I, without thinking, slid the door open for you, which is what you were trying to do. You let go with both hands, and stood there: legs wide apart, knees bent, and slowly eased yourself onto the floor. But you were standing free with no hands and balancing for a brief second or two.
I cheered, your mom, who was lying on the couch with her recently injured knee, also cheered. You smiled, because we were happy, though I don' think you understood what you did.
We're really hoping you can figure it out and make strides. You like walking while holding hands, now and can move your feet very quickly. I think you can probably do it, if you just try a little.
It was a complete accident: You were standing on the back porch playing with the screen door, sliding it open and closed, as you like to do. I, without thinking, slid the door open for you, which is what you were trying to do. You let go with both hands, and stood there: legs wide apart, knees bent, and slowly eased yourself onto the floor. But you were standing free with no hands and balancing for a brief second or two.
I cheered, your mom, who was lying on the couch with her recently injured knee, also cheered. You smiled, because we were happy, though I don' think you understood what you did.
We're really hoping you can figure it out and make strides. You like walking while holding hands, now and can move your feet very quickly. I think you can probably do it, if you just try a little.
Friday, May 16, 2014
Head first
Today your mom and I took you to the park after daycare. You laughed your head off at me "ghost floating" Oliver up into the pine tree that you love so much. Mom got it on video. I'll post it here.
We then had you on the swing, which you also loved. You just have the best time, and are so expressive with your happiness.
We then put you on the climbing equipment with the slides. You threw Oliver down the straight slide, and watched him end up stopped at the bottom. Then you wanted him back. We handed him to you. You threw him down the slide. We repeated this. Then I handed you my keys, and then your mom's. You also threw these down the slide. Every time, the object stopped at the bottom, and didn't fall off.
Then you reached down the slide with your hands, and lay down flat. And then slowly let yourself ease down, all the while keeping control of your speed with your hands. You picked up a little speed, but you also stopped at the bottom.
The first time you went down the slide by yourself, you went face first.
Although you did so after extensive experimentation and data collection with non-human test subjects.
Both are good signs, in my book. Be brave. Be smart. Have fun.
We then had you on the swing, which you also loved. You just have the best time, and are so expressive with your happiness.
We then put you on the climbing equipment with the slides. You threw Oliver down the straight slide, and watched him end up stopped at the bottom. Then you wanted him back. We handed him to you. You threw him down the slide. We repeated this. Then I handed you my keys, and then your mom's. You also threw these down the slide. Every time, the object stopped at the bottom, and didn't fall off.
Then you reached down the slide with your hands, and lay down flat. And then slowly let yourself ease down, all the while keeping control of your speed with your hands. You picked up a little speed, but you also stopped at the bottom.
The first time you went down the slide by yourself, you went face first.
Although you did so after extensive experimentation and data collection with non-human test subjects.
Both are good signs, in my book. Be brave. Be smart. Have fun.
Monday, April 21, 2014
Kindest soul
Today, you impressed me, taught me lessons, and re-assured me when i needed it. You're an amazing child.
We had to do another blood draw for you today, as we saw a developmental specialist, to see if there's anything behind your slowness to speak. We're going to rule out genetic causes.
You were your usual sweet self in the hospital, and in line, waving to everyone. You charmed everybody. You really reach out to people, and pull the out of their isolated selves, and make contact and wave to them. It's inspiring. You give people unconditional love and acceptance. You're 17 months old. You brighten lives.
As soon as I had to hold you for the blood draw, you understandably started to cry. I feel so bad for you when this happens, and it's hard because we can't use words to explain anything to you, and even then, frankly, it wouldn't hep much, because a needle stick is a big scary thing to a child. You cried and cried as we did the draw. I almost cried. When it was over, I cuddled you as best I could. I took you out of the lab while mom got directions on the next step in our tests for you (Hint: ask me about how they get a urine sample from someone still in diapers).
Once I got you to the hallway, you calmed down. We passed a woman asking if it was you who'd been crying, and I said yes. And then you waved to her with your little open close open close hand wave. You had just had a very traumatic experience, but instead of feeling bad for yourself, you wanted to reach out to other people and connect with them. It was an amazing lesson in how not to be self centered, but to think of others and be compassionate. You kept it up, waving to everyone in the lobby, and even to the lab tech that took your blood. You spread love and joy.
But your mom and I are back to being nervous about your development. And like a champion, tonight you were so much fun. You laughed and laughed at so many things. You imitated me doing many things. You tried to put a spoon in my mouth, then mom's. You thought it was hilarious to try to put one of the cat's balls in my mouth, and when I made a sour face and shook my head "no" you just laughed and tried harder. You crawled after cats in the front yard, and picked flowers. You played in the electric car pressing buttons, picking up a box of tissues, pulling out a tissue (you tried to pull out all of them, but I stopped you), and pretending to blow your nose, because that's what you do with tissues, you know? All of these things together showed me that you're a deeply emotionally connected person, and you're thinking about things,and understand how the world works. It makes me worry less about your delays, makes me hopeful that you're on your own schedule and will just catch up when you're ready. You gave me great little hugs, too. I needed that today, to believe it's al going to be just fine, and that you're OK.
Daddy loves you.
We had to do another blood draw for you today, as we saw a developmental specialist, to see if there's anything behind your slowness to speak. We're going to rule out genetic causes.
You were your usual sweet self in the hospital, and in line, waving to everyone. You charmed everybody. You really reach out to people, and pull the out of their isolated selves, and make contact and wave to them. It's inspiring. You give people unconditional love and acceptance. You're 17 months old. You brighten lives.
As soon as I had to hold you for the blood draw, you understandably started to cry. I feel so bad for you when this happens, and it's hard because we can't use words to explain anything to you, and even then, frankly, it wouldn't hep much, because a needle stick is a big scary thing to a child. You cried and cried as we did the draw. I almost cried. When it was over, I cuddled you as best I could. I took you out of the lab while mom got directions on the next step in our tests for you (Hint: ask me about how they get a urine sample from someone still in diapers).
Once I got you to the hallway, you calmed down. We passed a woman asking if it was you who'd been crying, and I said yes. And then you waved to her with your little open close open close hand wave. You had just had a very traumatic experience, but instead of feeling bad for yourself, you wanted to reach out to other people and connect with them. It was an amazing lesson in how not to be self centered, but to think of others and be compassionate. You kept it up, waving to everyone in the lobby, and even to the lab tech that took your blood. You spread love and joy.
But your mom and I are back to being nervous about your development. And like a champion, tonight you were so much fun. You laughed and laughed at so many things. You imitated me doing many things. You tried to put a spoon in my mouth, then mom's. You thought it was hilarious to try to put one of the cat's balls in my mouth, and when I made a sour face and shook my head "no" you just laughed and tried harder. You crawled after cats in the front yard, and picked flowers. You played in the electric car pressing buttons, picking up a box of tissues, pulling out a tissue (you tried to pull out all of them, but I stopped you), and pretending to blow your nose, because that's what you do with tissues, you know? All of these things together showed me that you're a deeply emotionally connected person, and you're thinking about things,and understand how the world works. It makes me worry less about your delays, makes me hopeful that you're on your own schedule and will just catch up when you're ready. You gave me great little hugs, too. I needed that today, to believe it's al going to be just fine, and that you're OK.
Daddy loves you.
Saturday, April 12, 2014
I hope it's always true
I told your mom how happy I am that when you're upset about something, I can comfort you with a hug and a cuddle.
Your mom said, "Yes, and he does the same for you."
So true. When you come to me and give me a hug or a snuggle, everything in the world is perfect.
I'm having a lot of fun trying to help you learn to walk now. You just smile and smile, like you're doing some kind of trick when you walk holding my hands. Your steps are stompy,and then sometimes you get excited and just stamp your feet in place very fast before proceeding to make forward progress. It's adorable.
Your mom said, "Yes, and he does the same for you."
So true. When you come to me and give me a hug or a snuggle, everything in the world is perfect.
I'm having a lot of fun trying to help you learn to walk now. You just smile and smile, like you're doing some kind of trick when you walk holding my hands. Your steps are stompy,and then sometimes you get excited and just stamp your feet in place very fast before proceeding to make forward progress. It's adorable.
Saturday, March 29, 2014
Your priorities
Your mom and I are worried that you're not doing the same things as other kids your age. No walking, no words, not a lot of the basic sounds.
BUT what's encouraging is that you seem to understand some words. You're not a regular responder to them, but you can sometimes show us "daddy's nose" and "mommy's nose" though when we ask "where's Johann's nose?" you just sit as if to say "who's Johann?".
The latest "He understands us!" moment has come from "monster face". The faces you learned to make at daycare, your mom and I have dubbed "monster face". You've only been making this face for less than a month, and only your mom and I say "monster face" to you. But now, when we say "monster face" without showing you with our faces what we're talking about (so we don't make funny faces), you will do it. In fact, a few times, we've mentioned it in passing, and you'll hear the phrase, and do the face. It's thrilling to get confirmation that you do understand some of what we're saying.
What's even more fun/ funny/ hopeful/ interesting is that you've not bothered to show understanding of "more", "eat", "food", "cat", "diaper", or "johann". But you have learned a word that's about making other people laugh. You seem to value having fun, and laughing with people. If that's the kind of person you are, you go ahead and take all the time you need to talk and walk. It'll be so worth waiting for.
Your mom and I love you so.
Your mom read a very sad story about a woman searching for her lost baby in the mudslide that just happened in Washington state. You won't know how horrifically sad that is until you have children of your own. I don't think I'd do any differently than that poor woman, it would be all I could do with my grief if our roles were reversed. digging through a mountain with a teaspoon is nothing to find my lost child.
BUT what's encouraging is that you seem to understand some words. You're not a regular responder to them, but you can sometimes show us "daddy's nose" and "mommy's nose" though when we ask "where's Johann's nose?" you just sit as if to say "who's Johann?".
The latest "He understands us!" moment has come from "monster face". The faces you learned to make at daycare, your mom and I have dubbed "monster face". You've only been making this face for less than a month, and only your mom and I say "monster face" to you. But now, when we say "monster face" without showing you with our faces what we're talking about (so we don't make funny faces), you will do it. In fact, a few times, we've mentioned it in passing, and you'll hear the phrase, and do the face. It's thrilling to get confirmation that you do understand some of what we're saying.
What's even more fun/ funny/ hopeful/ interesting is that you've not bothered to show understanding of "more", "eat", "food", "cat", "diaper", or "johann". But you have learned a word that's about making other people laugh. You seem to value having fun, and laughing with people. If that's the kind of person you are, you go ahead and take all the time you need to talk and walk. It'll be so worth waiting for.
Your mom and I love you so.
Your mom read a very sad story about a woman searching for her lost baby in the mudslide that just happened in Washington state. You won't know how horrifically sad that is until you have children of your own. I don't think I'd do any differently than that poor woman, it would be all I could do with my grief if our roles were reversed. digging through a mountain with a teaspoon is nothing to find my lost child.
Thursday, March 20, 2014
Guaranteed to fail
Your mom and I watched "Ender's Game" tonight. There are so many things I could say to you right now, that this story makes me want to tell you.
For now, I'll focus on just one thought.
Your mom said she's watched a lot of sci-fi (and we all know she has). She says she thinks about the end of "The Terminator", in which Sarah Connor is driving away into Mexico, beginning to leave recordings for her un born son.
In some ways, that's what I'm doing here. I'm leaving you notes that you may find and read in the future. I'm hoping that, in their totality, they tell you things you find useful. They may not be right, but at least it'll give you a lot of source material to try to understand your parents, and possibly yourself. SO much of who we are comes wired into us from the beginning. It doesn't mean we're fated, but we have to understand our most basic natures, and tendencies, and to start from the truth about ourselves if we wish to be able to become what we want. Starting with the truth as a fundamental assumption is always best. Reasoning from falsehood doesn't usually lead to success. Know and accept who you are, and after doing this, then choose who you want to be. You can be what you want, but first you must know yourself.
Back to the Terminator. As parents, we try to prepare our children for life. We want them to be happy and capable. The problem is, the world changes quickly, and we don't know what the future holds. I have to try to prepare you for a future that I can't anticipate. I'm sure that there will be some important aspect that I don't see coming, and hence fail to prepare you for.
Putting it another way, my parents did their best with me. They taught me what they thought was right. Some of it was very good for me, like emphasis on learning and school, doing my best, reading, books, ideas, eating dinner together, support for athletics and extra-curricular interests. From my dad, I learned curiosity, open mindedness, love of sci fi and games. From my mom's side I learned affection and humor.
But there were some ideas they passed on to me which didn't serve me well. They thought these ideas were good, because they lived by them. But they didn't work for me.
I know at some level, I'm doomed to repeat this. I will pass on to you the best of how I was raised, I hope, and I'll also try to do things differently, too, where I think different is better. I'll do my best. But I know some part of it won't be right, because the world will be different for you than it was for me. I didn't have cell phones (until my mid 20's) or the internet (until college). You'll grow up with technology and social change very different from what I saw, and I know I'll not get it all right. I'm really sorry. Know that I'm doing my best, with what I know to be true at the time.
Love you so much.
For now, I'll focus on just one thought.
Your mom said she's watched a lot of sci-fi (and we all know she has). She says she thinks about the end of "The Terminator", in which Sarah Connor is driving away into Mexico, beginning to leave recordings for her un born son.
In some ways, that's what I'm doing here. I'm leaving you notes that you may find and read in the future. I'm hoping that, in their totality, they tell you things you find useful. They may not be right, but at least it'll give you a lot of source material to try to understand your parents, and possibly yourself. SO much of who we are comes wired into us from the beginning. It doesn't mean we're fated, but we have to understand our most basic natures, and tendencies, and to start from the truth about ourselves if we wish to be able to become what we want. Starting with the truth as a fundamental assumption is always best. Reasoning from falsehood doesn't usually lead to success. Know and accept who you are, and after doing this, then choose who you want to be. You can be what you want, but first you must know yourself.
Back to the Terminator. As parents, we try to prepare our children for life. We want them to be happy and capable. The problem is, the world changes quickly, and we don't know what the future holds. I have to try to prepare you for a future that I can't anticipate. I'm sure that there will be some important aspect that I don't see coming, and hence fail to prepare you for.
Putting it another way, my parents did their best with me. They taught me what they thought was right. Some of it was very good for me, like emphasis on learning and school, doing my best, reading, books, ideas, eating dinner together, support for athletics and extra-curricular interests. From my dad, I learned curiosity, open mindedness, love of sci fi and games. From my mom's side I learned affection and humor.
But there were some ideas they passed on to me which didn't serve me well. They thought these ideas were good, because they lived by them. But they didn't work for me.
I know at some level, I'm doomed to repeat this. I will pass on to you the best of how I was raised, I hope, and I'll also try to do things differently, too, where I think different is better. I'll do my best. But I know some part of it won't be right, because the world will be different for you than it was for me. I didn't have cell phones (until my mid 20's) or the internet (until college). You'll grow up with technology and social change very different from what I saw, and I know I'll not get it all right. I'm really sorry. Know that I'm doing my best, with what I know to be true at the time.
Love you so much.
Thursday, March 13, 2014
Such good news
Your blood tests all came back normal. Yay! It remains a mystery why you're developing at about 2/3 the rate of normal, but at least major metabolic issues have been ruled out.
Last night, Jon from next door was over, and after dinner you were playing on the floor. You kept going for the beer glasses. You were very disappointed they were empty. Eventually you got huffy when I gave you the chance to play with one, and I realized you were asking us for a drink, not the glasses. I gave you your sippy cup with milk, and that was the answer. You're getting good at expressing which doors you want opened, too. You reach up with your arms, and grunt, and look at us. "I am displeased that this door is closed! You! Turn the handle and open it, that I may enter!" It's very cute.
I fed you some tiny bits of a chocolate candy last night. You nearly bit my finger off. You don't know how to lick something off a finger, just bite. Pretty funny.
I took video of you swinging at the park yesterday on your 16 month birthday. You're laughing and making faces. and eating cheese and some strawberry pieces I cut up. Funny.
Last night, Jon from next door was over, and after dinner you were playing on the floor. You kept going for the beer glasses. You were very disappointed they were empty. Eventually you got huffy when I gave you the chance to play with one, and I realized you were asking us for a drink, not the glasses. I gave you your sippy cup with milk, and that was the answer. You're getting good at expressing which doors you want opened, too. You reach up with your arms, and grunt, and look at us. "I am displeased that this door is closed! You! Turn the handle and open it, that I may enter!" It's very cute.
I fed you some tiny bits of a chocolate candy last night. You nearly bit my finger off. You don't know how to lick something off a finger, just bite. Pretty funny.
I took video of you swinging at the park yesterday on your 16 month birthday. You're laughing and making faces. and eating cheese and some strawberry pieces I cut up. Funny.
Wednesday, March 12, 2014
Resilient
Today your mom and I took you to the lab to have some blood taken for some metabolic tests, to see if there's anything going on that explains your being a bit behind the developmental curve. We were both dreading it, because we know how hard it can be to draw blood from such a tiny person, and we knew it meant some scary things for you.
I held you, and held your non-donating arm under the work table. Your mom stayed close and sung to you when it was at the worst for you. It went pretty well. One stick, but she had to probe a bit with the needle to find a vein. Hard to watch.
But after it was done, you really recovered quickly. You took some cuddling from me, and we stopped to look at some trees and spring blossoms on the walk to the car, and you were back to being your usual self. It's remarkable how well you recover from such things. Your mom and I both wanted a drink.
We got some pictures from Sirlei that you were a happy little man at daycare. It was good to see.
I held you, and held your non-donating arm under the work table. Your mom stayed close and sung to you when it was at the worst for you. It went pretty well. One stick, but she had to probe a bit with the needle to find a vein. Hard to watch.
But after it was done, you really recovered quickly. You took some cuddling from me, and we stopped to look at some trees and spring blossoms on the walk to the car, and you were back to being your usual self. It's remarkable how well you recover from such things. Your mom and I both wanted a drink.
We got some pictures from Sirlei that you were a happy little man at daycare. It was good to see.
Tuesday, March 11, 2014
Nervous
Today we took you to see your doctor to check on a little raw spot near your diaper that we just can't get you to shake. It just keeps coming back.
The solution for that is pretty simple. We need to boost the antifungal cream we've been using with some prescribed hydrocortisone cream. Not hard.
Your Doctor, who is very thorough and cautious also checked your size, and a few other things. The fact is you remain behind what we'd expect for your age. You don't have many real words (you use mamama for me, and mom, and lots of other things) and you're not really walking and you don't stack blocks and the bones of your skull haven't yet fused. We've been keeping an eye on this for a while, and have watched your growth relative to your growth curve. You've been close to it, but still below the chart line, and the time has come to do some blood tests.
I'm pretty nervous.
I don't know what to hope for right now. I suppose something definite, benign, and curable?
Your daddy loves you.
The solution for that is pretty simple. We need to boost the antifungal cream we've been using with some prescribed hydrocortisone cream. Not hard.
Your Doctor, who is very thorough and cautious also checked your size, and a few other things. The fact is you remain behind what we'd expect for your age. You don't have many real words (you use mamama for me, and mom, and lots of other things) and you're not really walking and you don't stack blocks and the bones of your skull haven't yet fused. We've been keeping an eye on this for a while, and have watched your growth relative to your growth curve. You've been close to it, but still below the chart line, and the time has come to do some blood tests.
I'm pretty nervous.
- I don't want you to get poked with a needle. It's what's best for you, but I hate to think about it.
- I'm afraid they'll find something. I'm afraid we'll have missed it and I'm afraid you'll suffer some long term setback as a result. I'm terrified we'll have hurt your long term potential in your first year.
- I'm afraid they'll find nothing. I won't know what to make of it. Why are you so little?
I don't know what to hope for right now. I suppose something definite, benign, and curable?
Your daddy loves you.
Saturday, March 8, 2014
Cookies!
Today your mom and I went over to our friends Suzanne & John's house to meet their new baby, Jasper. We brought them dinner (chicken Mole) and I made peanut butter cookies for them. I made the dough here at home while you sat in your high chair and ate avocado, mozzarella cheese and O's. You didn't like the sound of the electric mixer too much, but when I fed you a morsel of cookie dough, I got a very big smile from you.
Tonight when you got to try actual cookies, you were also very happy. Today you had peanutbutter cookies for the first time, and you loved them.
Tonight when you got to try actual cookies, you were also very happy. Today you had peanutbutter cookies for the first time, and you loved them.
Friday, March 7, 2014
Future saver
Tonight after daycare your mom and I took you to a new park. You had missed your snack, so we fed you Cheerios and tiny bites of mozzarella cheese stick while you were in the tiny tot swing. You thought it was funny when I popped an o in your mouth as you swung forwards, and you wanted to try the cheese bite hand off on the fly, but that didn't work so well, so we took to stopping your swing, handing you the cheese bite, and then restarting. We had to slow down the cheese because you started to "chipmunk" it (fil your cheeks without swallowing any).
As the budding botanist you seem to be, you noticed some coniferous tree with hairy bright yellow flowers. I have no idea what it was, but you wanted to check out the flowers. You always smile so wide and bright when you get to touch and explore something new.
The park had a tunnel slide for the big kids, and I took you down that. Mom got video on her phone. You really loved it. We did it several times. Eventually, you wanted to crawl up the steep and slick slide, and I don't think even I would have had an easy time of that. So we went back to the tiny kid part of the park where there was a mini version. You crawled up the mini tunnel (with some difficulty and help from me, because it was really slipery), and then crawled up the rest of the play equipment to the straight slide, which you simply dove down head first. Mom caught you. I was impressed that you were so brave.
At home tonight you showed even more mastery of putting blocks into your car trunk, and have been very interested in opening and closing doors. You pull on the door stops to open them when closed,because it's all you can reach and get ahold of.
Your mom washed my rowing backpack, because I had left a banana in there by accident for a LONG time. It was black and moldy and sour smelling when I finally found it. So the whole thing needed a cleaning. When she emptied it, there were a few dimes, a nickel and a quarter. I decided they should go in your piggy bank, so I got your bank off the shelf, helped you and the bank in my lap, and showed you the dimes going in to the bank. You immediately understood what I was inviting you to do with the nickel and quarter, and got the nickel in first try. The quarter was a bit harder for you, and at one point, you tried to give it to me to do for you. You have a very logical understanding that just asking an adult is more efficient. we'll still try to teach you to do things for yourself. I also hope to teach you how to be smart with your money, and disciplined. Tonight you practiced "saving" for the first time. I hope it becomes a fun thing. When I was a small boy, I found all kinds of money on the sidewalk. I'd ask my daddy if I could put the coins in his "coin purse" which was a plastic oval with a slit, like a deflated football, about 3 inches long. Back in those days, coins in the US were actually worth carrying. The idea was, dad would keep it in there for safe keeping, and when I got home with him, he'd give me the coins back and I'd put them in my piggy bank. It's what started me off being a saver, too. I always felt bad spending anything from it, and I loved opening it up from time to time to see what I had.
Ask me some day to tell you about mowing grass for Mr. Jorgensen and saving up to buy a bike.
You went to bed without a fuss again tonight. You're a sweet, fun loving, giggly curious child, and I love you more than you will know until you have your own children. I hope I get to see that some day.
As the budding botanist you seem to be, you noticed some coniferous tree with hairy bright yellow flowers. I have no idea what it was, but you wanted to check out the flowers. You always smile so wide and bright when you get to touch and explore something new.
The park had a tunnel slide for the big kids, and I took you down that. Mom got video on her phone. You really loved it. We did it several times. Eventually, you wanted to crawl up the steep and slick slide, and I don't think even I would have had an easy time of that. So we went back to the tiny kid part of the park where there was a mini version. You crawled up the mini tunnel (with some difficulty and help from me, because it was really slipery), and then crawled up the rest of the play equipment to the straight slide, which you simply dove down head first. Mom caught you. I was impressed that you were so brave.
At home tonight you showed even more mastery of putting blocks into your car trunk, and have been very interested in opening and closing doors. You pull on the door stops to open them when closed,because it's all you can reach and get ahold of.
Your mom washed my rowing backpack, because I had left a banana in there by accident for a LONG time. It was black and moldy and sour smelling when I finally found it. So the whole thing needed a cleaning. When she emptied it, there were a few dimes, a nickel and a quarter. I decided they should go in your piggy bank, so I got your bank off the shelf, helped you and the bank in my lap, and showed you the dimes going in to the bank. You immediately understood what I was inviting you to do with the nickel and quarter, and got the nickel in first try. The quarter was a bit harder for you, and at one point, you tried to give it to me to do for you. You have a very logical understanding that just asking an adult is more efficient. we'll still try to teach you to do things for yourself. I also hope to teach you how to be smart with your money, and disciplined. Tonight you practiced "saving" for the first time. I hope it becomes a fun thing. When I was a small boy, I found all kinds of money on the sidewalk. I'd ask my daddy if I could put the coins in his "coin purse" which was a plastic oval with a slit, like a deflated football, about 3 inches long. Back in those days, coins in the US were actually worth carrying. The idea was, dad would keep it in there for safe keeping, and when I got home with him, he'd give me the coins back and I'd put them in my piggy bank. It's what started me off being a saver, too. I always felt bad spending anything from it, and I loved opening it up from time to time to see what I had.
Ask me some day to tell you about mowing grass for Mr. Jorgensen and saving up to buy a bike.
You went to bed without a fuss again tonight. You're a sweet, fun loving, giggly curious child, and I love you more than you will know until you have your own children. I hope I get to see that some day.
Thursday, March 6, 2014
Such a great day with you!
Well, not really a full day, because you were in daycare.
This morning after rowing I got to hold you while your mom got dressed. You wake up hungry and thirsty these days, and I gave you milk and some cheerios and some blueberries. You picked the O's out of my hand, guzzled your milk from the sippy cup and got much of it on your front.
When i picked you up from daycare, you were outside crawling on the patio with the girls, who were playing. It was about 63, so a nice spring day. Sirlei told me you had crawled into one of the little plastic houses, and played at the kitchen, and found something so terribly funny with her that you laughed until you shook. You do that. When you think something is really hilarious, you laugh your little ass off. You seem to appreciate absurdist things. People doing something intentionally out of place. For example, after the park tonight, I put you in your car seat, and you were in a good mood so I just sat there playing with you. You picked up the strap used to tighten your shoulder straps and kind of handed it to me. I took it in my mouth, and kept it there, and you thought this was the height of comedy.
I was sad that i missed such a happy moment for you at daycare. It really does tear at me, to leave you with others for so much of every day. I tell myself you're happy with the other kids, and it's more fun that you'd have if you were home. And I do have to work, we do need to pay for life. But I fear I'll miss your first steps, first words. When I feel like I missed a special moment with you, it's hard. I question my priorities.
I've started trying to take you to the park right after I get you. It's easy to do, it's on the way hoe, and it gives us some fun time, and give you new experiences. Today I took you down the twisty slide on my lap, which was your first time doing this. You got a little nervous, but then realized you were safe, and decided it was fun and laughed at the end. I did it a few times, and got video. I also got the bright idea to hold you next to me, but as we started, you reached out your little hand and it dragged on the slide. it got pulled back a bit, but I pulled you into my arms before anything bad happened. You were scared and a little hurt, and I held you close and walked to the car. You calmed down really quickly, and just snuggled me. It was great. So I walked with you like that around the park a bit, getting a super cuddle from you. Super.
I took you home, and got a quick video clip of you removing your socks. You are nearly OCD about pulling off your socks. In fact, it's a way to calm you down: After your bath tonight you were a bit fussy, but once I put your socks on, you were instantly calm, because you were focused on taking your socks off. You grab hold and just pull with all your might until it releases. I figure, there'll come a time when you stop doing this, but we tend to forget how precious these "ordinary" things are, so I got it.
I fed you your mom's Thai curry, which you loved. I think you hit a ginger ball or something, though, because at one point you got very unhappy. I gave you yogurt, in case it was spicy, to neutralize it.
I took you in the bath tub with me for the first time. Usually you do bath time with mom. You had a great time. You loved standing up on things, and were a bit startled when i turned the water on to add more hot to the tub. You kept trying to grab a plastic duck, but because it was floating, it moved away from you when you put your hand on it. You've not mastered the precision snatch needed to get a floating toy.
After your bath I dressed you and we played with your little pop up pegs. You can almost put them back in their slots. You can depress them, but cant' quite figure out how to slide your finger off them to make them pop out. We played a little crawling chase around the hexagonal table. I fed you more curry.
When bedtime came,i ave you some milk in a sippy cup, and was going to put you down, but decided to try to show you a book first. I really want you to get in the habit of expecting books, but you've just been uninterested. Well, you actually sat still for your fuzzy animals book, and petted the lion fur, and the koala fur. You also kind of understood the treefrog sticky pads. When the book ws done, you flopped on the furry throw onthe couch and snuggled in and I knew you were ready to sleep. I took you to your crib, and instead of the usual crying, you just lay right down on your belly and settled in.
When you cry when we put you down, sometimes I think it's because you just want more time with us, and I feel terrible about cutting our time short. Tonight, I think you got a mega dose of daddy time, and were happy to go to sleep. I hope we have lots of good times together in the evening. I can't wait to play games with you.
This morning after rowing I got to hold you while your mom got dressed. You wake up hungry and thirsty these days, and I gave you milk and some cheerios and some blueberries. You picked the O's out of my hand, guzzled your milk from the sippy cup and got much of it on your front.
When i picked you up from daycare, you were outside crawling on the patio with the girls, who were playing. It was about 63, so a nice spring day. Sirlei told me you had crawled into one of the little plastic houses, and played at the kitchen, and found something so terribly funny with her that you laughed until you shook. You do that. When you think something is really hilarious, you laugh your little ass off. You seem to appreciate absurdist things. People doing something intentionally out of place. For example, after the park tonight, I put you in your car seat, and you were in a good mood so I just sat there playing with you. You picked up the strap used to tighten your shoulder straps and kind of handed it to me. I took it in my mouth, and kept it there, and you thought this was the height of comedy.
I was sad that i missed such a happy moment for you at daycare. It really does tear at me, to leave you with others for so much of every day. I tell myself you're happy with the other kids, and it's more fun that you'd have if you were home. And I do have to work, we do need to pay for life. But I fear I'll miss your first steps, first words. When I feel like I missed a special moment with you, it's hard. I question my priorities.
I've started trying to take you to the park right after I get you. It's easy to do, it's on the way hoe, and it gives us some fun time, and give you new experiences. Today I took you down the twisty slide on my lap, which was your first time doing this. You got a little nervous, but then realized you were safe, and decided it was fun and laughed at the end. I did it a few times, and got video. I also got the bright idea to hold you next to me, but as we started, you reached out your little hand and it dragged on the slide. it got pulled back a bit, but I pulled you into my arms before anything bad happened. You were scared and a little hurt, and I held you close and walked to the car. You calmed down really quickly, and just snuggled me. It was great. So I walked with you like that around the park a bit, getting a super cuddle from you. Super.
I took you home, and got a quick video clip of you removing your socks. You are nearly OCD about pulling off your socks. In fact, it's a way to calm you down: After your bath tonight you were a bit fussy, but once I put your socks on, you were instantly calm, because you were focused on taking your socks off. You grab hold and just pull with all your might until it releases. I figure, there'll come a time when you stop doing this, but we tend to forget how precious these "ordinary" things are, so I got it.
I fed you your mom's Thai curry, which you loved. I think you hit a ginger ball or something, though, because at one point you got very unhappy. I gave you yogurt, in case it was spicy, to neutralize it.
I took you in the bath tub with me for the first time. Usually you do bath time with mom. You had a great time. You loved standing up on things, and were a bit startled when i turned the water on to add more hot to the tub. You kept trying to grab a plastic duck, but because it was floating, it moved away from you when you put your hand on it. You've not mastered the precision snatch needed to get a floating toy.
After your bath I dressed you and we played with your little pop up pegs. You can almost put them back in their slots. You can depress them, but cant' quite figure out how to slide your finger off them to make them pop out. We played a little crawling chase around the hexagonal table. I fed you more curry.
When bedtime came,i ave you some milk in a sippy cup, and was going to put you down, but decided to try to show you a book first. I really want you to get in the habit of expecting books, but you've just been uninterested. Well, you actually sat still for your fuzzy animals book, and petted the lion fur, and the koala fur. You also kind of understood the treefrog sticky pads. When the book ws done, you flopped on the furry throw onthe couch and snuggled in and I knew you were ready to sleep. I took you to your crib, and instead of the usual crying, you just lay right down on your belly and settled in.
When you cry when we put you down, sometimes I think it's because you just want more time with us, and I feel terrible about cutting our time short. Tonight, I think you got a mega dose of daddy time, and were happy to go to sleep. I hope we have lots of good times together in the evening. I can't wait to play games with you.
Wednesday, March 5, 2014
Clever Boy
Today I watched you form plans. You wanted to put some of your blocks in the "trunk" of your car. You'd been having a hard time opening the trunk. It's tricky, because there's only a small indentation in the middle that lets you slip your finger underneath to lift the lid. Once you got it open, you thought about letting go with both hands to go for your block. It looked like the kind of thing that would stay open. Instead, you decided to hold the lid open with one hand, since it had been so hard to open. Not worth the risk. You then filled it with blocks with your free hand.
Tonight you snuggled the fuzzy Koala in one of your touch and feel books. At this point, you won't sit still for a reading, so I just show you pages in a drive-by fashion while you're doing something else. I get some of your attention for a few minutes, which is better than nothing. The touch and feel books seem more interesting to you, because there's something to do. I don't think you really understand words or pictures yet. But on the fuzzy Koala page, you leaned over and rubbed your face on the gray fur. Super cute.
You're such a handful on the changing table! You will not lie still once your diaper is off. You immediately try to roll to your belly,then crawl to the opposite end of the changing table, to look through the various creams and lotions to find something to play with. You'll pull the air freshener off the handle, pull the detachable handle off. You will just not sit still. What's nice is that you seem to think it's a game. When I hold you in place by grabbing your legs and making them counter-balance your roll, you try really hard to get away. But then when you can't. you just laugh at me. Better than the alternative. It takes a good 10 minutes to change you into night time clothes, due to the extra wiggles. You also like to stand up and reach for me to pick you up, before you're changed. I don't mind it. Tonight I got you to hold still for your mom by nuzzling in by your neck and making NOM NOM NOM noises. It tickled you, but it made you hold still so Kel could change you.
I was a bad daddy and gave you tiny nibbles of chocolate before bed. I ate one, and you saw me eating something, so crawled over to me, asked to be picked up, then tried to open my mouth to see what was in it. How could I resist that? I had to indulge your curiosity and expressive request. So I unwrapped another, and took micro nibbles, which I then passed to you. You wanted MOAR CHOCOLATE. You tried to grab the large chunk out of my hand, and wouldn't wait for the tiny bits. I had to hide the rest of it from you.
Tonight you snuggled the fuzzy Koala in one of your touch and feel books. At this point, you won't sit still for a reading, so I just show you pages in a drive-by fashion while you're doing something else. I get some of your attention for a few minutes, which is better than nothing. The touch and feel books seem more interesting to you, because there's something to do. I don't think you really understand words or pictures yet. But on the fuzzy Koala page, you leaned over and rubbed your face on the gray fur. Super cute.
You're such a handful on the changing table! You will not lie still once your diaper is off. You immediately try to roll to your belly,then crawl to the opposite end of the changing table, to look through the various creams and lotions to find something to play with. You'll pull the air freshener off the handle, pull the detachable handle off. You will just not sit still. What's nice is that you seem to think it's a game. When I hold you in place by grabbing your legs and making them counter-balance your roll, you try really hard to get away. But then when you can't. you just laugh at me. Better than the alternative. It takes a good 10 minutes to change you into night time clothes, due to the extra wiggles. You also like to stand up and reach for me to pick you up, before you're changed. I don't mind it. Tonight I got you to hold still for your mom by nuzzling in by your neck and making NOM NOM NOM noises. It tickled you, but it made you hold still so Kel could change you.
I was a bad daddy and gave you tiny nibbles of chocolate before bed. I ate one, and you saw me eating something, so crawled over to me, asked to be picked up, then tried to open my mouth to see what was in it. How could I resist that? I had to indulge your curiosity and expressive request. So I unwrapped another, and took micro nibbles, which I then passed to you. You wanted MOAR CHOCOLATE. You tried to grab the large chunk out of my hand, and wouldn't wait for the tiny bits. I had to hide the rest of it from you.
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